Monday, May 25, 2009

Sorry, we've been a little busy...

So if you know us IRL, you probably already know that our nephew "A" fractured his femur a week ago yesterday, you might know we were finally successful in car shopping, and perhaps you knew yesterday was Decoration @ our church. Whew.
"A" was just playing in the nursery, pushing a truck along the floor, and fell over and landed with his leg twisted underneath him. Little dude is in a body cast, from just below his chest, down to his ankle on the right leg, and just above his knee on his left leg. His sister "E" spent the night with us last Sunday night, and we spent a few evenings at their house, playing and entertaining for a while. "A" is doing quite well most of the time, and "E" is excited that Aunt Nessa and Uncle J get to play more than usual! ;) Mom and Dad are a little exhausted from holding and caring for a toddler stuck in the semi-upright position! ;)
We ended up getting an '09 H.onda C.ivic, because the price difference between that and an '06 we looked at was only a couple thousand. It's a good Kid Hauler, and the plan is drive it until the wheels fall off. It's also pretty. But in a few hours, we're taking my "old" car down to the dealership. It makes me a little sad -- that was my first car, we got it after the 18-wheeler accident, and I paid for it. Sure, I talked bad about it at times, but it always got me were I needed to go. Sigh... RIP, Nancy the Nissan.
Decoration. Rain. Family reunion / picnic @ Camp S.umatanga. Mud. But it was still fun! The rain actually stopped before the picnic, and held off until it was over. Then I got adult-napped and went bicycle-hunting with a sister and 3 boys.
Not sure what the next few weeks holds -- we may be entertaining Body Cast Boy and His Sister a bit, so there might not be much posting on the adoption front. We are 11 months and 12 days away from being eligible to apply. :)

Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Tiny update, etc

Tiny update:
I got a call today about the fostering classes through the Baptist Children*s H.ome... They're going to be held in Calhoun County (not very close to us...) or in the early afternoons before either of us get off from work (I *could* make it, but there's not really any way Jason could get off 2 days a week X 10 weeks...) so it just hasn't really worked out. Kind of a bummer, but somewhat of an expected bummer.
Right now it looks like we'll just be spending the next 11 months doing some more waiting. Isaiah 40:31 (King James Version) says.......
31But they that wait upon the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.
So we wait.
Etc: Please pray for our pastor, Bro Tom, his wife, Jackie, and their family. Jackie's cancer is back with a vengeance. I went to church Sunday, even though I had every intention of staying home, because I wanted to be there to show my support. Please pray for our friends Tisha and Greg, who just brought home 2/3 of their babies! The little girl was supposed to come home today. Mama and the triplets are doing well!
Still waiting and hoping.....

Sunday, May 3, 2009

Mother's Day, for the Un-Mother

Disclaimer: This post took forever to write. There was lots of writing, erasing, re-writing, and changing going on. I'm not generally this open about being an Un-Mother, so please be gentle! ;)

In looking head to next week's Sunday School lesson, we'll be discussing Hannah. I think the book focuses more on the vow that Hannah made to God and the seriousness of such a vow, and of course the usual Mother's Day stuff, in that Hannah was an awesome mother. I'm pretty sure the Greatest Mom Ever List goes something like: Mary, Hannah, my mom... hahaha
Some background: Hannah was married to Elkanah, who was also a husband to Penninah. Hannah was barren, and Penninah was far from it. The Bible says that Penninah provoked Hannah about being barren, to the point that Hannah cried and would not eat. When he gave his sacrifice, Elkanah gave Penninah and her children their portion, and he gave Hannah a double portion out of love. He later asked her why she was so upset, saying "Am I not better to you than 10 sons?" Year after year, Hannah prayed for a child. Year after year, Penninah made Hannah's barren-ness more difficult. Year after year, Elkanah misunderstood why his wife was so upset.
Hannah went to the temple, where she prayed fervently. (Possible understatement of the year award) She wept, and prayed, and was so "into" her praying that Eli, the priest, thought she was drunk. She told him she was not drunk, but pouring her soul out to God. Of course, if you know the story, you know that Hannah vowed to God that if He would give her a son, she would give her son back to God, and not a razor would fall on his head. God did indeed give Hannah Samuel***, and she followed through with her vow. "For this child I prayed, and the Lord hath granted me my petition which I asked of Him" I Samuel 1:27
This is a little what Mother's Day is like for the Un-Mother. Now, most of the time, nobody is making fun of the Un-Mother, or purposely calling her out, but it still stings. There are lots of types of Un-Mothers. The never-been-pregnant-Un-Mother. The can-conceive-but-not-maintain-a-pregnancy-Un-Mother. The not-married-but-wants-a-husband-and-children-Un-Mother. The has-one-or-more-children-but-now-experiencing-secondary-infertility-Un-Mother. The I-have-a-child-in-Heaven-Un-Mother. None of the Un-Mothers trump any of the others, the pain is still there. All of the mothers are asked to stand and be recognized, and the Un-Mother is one of the few females over the age of 18 who is still seated. All of the mothers are given roses, or gift books, or whatever your church does to recognize mothers, and the Un-Mother hides her tears, not so much that she doesn't receive a gift, but more so that she doesn't qualify for that gift. The Un-Mother may disappear during the service. The otherwise-faithful-in-church-attendance Un-Mother may just skip that particular service all together.
There are those who would tell the Un-Mother to celebrate her own mom on that day, or to honor the women in her life who ARE moms, and to remember that "one day" she will "probably" be a mom, too. We Un-Mothers DO want to celebrate our moms, and we DO want to honor those moms around us.... But we also know that "one day" seems like an eternity when your arms are empty, and "probably" is no promise that those arms will be filled.
You may not always see us weeping and praying for children. We have our own Penninah's we have to face. Well-meaning people misunderstand our reasons for being upset and grieving over our current barren states. Just because we don't appear as Hannah on the outside, doesn't mean we aren't crying and praying in our hearts.
As you remember and honor moms next week, please don't forget the Un-Mothers.

***God also blessed Hannah with 3 sons and 2 daughters, in I Samuel 2:21.